Children are fragile. They thrive of routine and stability, and any disruption of those characteristics can significantly disrupt their lives. This is why the news of divorce can send shockwaves across nearly every aspect of their livelihood. While that might sound scary, the truth of the matter is that children are resilient. Yours will get through your divorce. That’s not to say that you shouldn’t try to lessen the blow news of divorce will have on them. In fact, there’s a lot you can do to minimize the impact of divorce on your children.
Here’s what you can do to minimize the effects of divorce on your children
There’s a lot you can do to make breaking the news of divorce to your children, and the process of divorce, as easy as possible. Here are just a few of them.
- Be prepared: Know what your going to say to your children before you sit down with them to tell them that you and your spouse are getting divorced.
- Present a united front: It might be hard to do depending on the circumstances of your divorce, but don’t play the blame game when it comes to telling your children about divorce. Doing so could create animosity amongst you and your children and make it much harder to co-parent and address other divorce legal issues.
- Listen to your children: Your children are going to be upset, angry, sad, and a whole range of other emotions. Don’t get mad at your children for feeling how they feel. Be understanding, listen to them, and be honest when they ask questions.
- Reassure: Your children know that a lot is going to change, but they need to know what won’t change. So, tell them that you’ll continue to love them and that you and your spouse will continue to work together for the betterment of the family. Identify routines that will remain the same, too, so that your children will continue to have some semblance of stability.
- Don’t give false hope: Whatever you do, don’t fill your children with false hope. Whether it’s reuniting with your spouse or promising certain custody arrangements, be honest and don’t leave the decisions to your children. Doing otherwise could just set them up for disappointment and more resentment.
Be prepared with a legal strategy
As hard as breaking the news of divorce to your children can be, it’s really only one of the first steps in what is oftentimes a long process. To protect your interests, as well as those of your children, you’re going to need a strong legal strategy. Only then can you ensure that you do as much as you can to ease the stress of divorce on yourself and your children.
