There are a lot of legal issues that you’ll have to deal with once divorce proceedings are initiated, but you might be worried about some of the steps you need to take before you even get to that point, including simply breaking the news of divorce to your spouse. This can be an intimidating endeavor, especially if you’re uncertain about how your spouse will react to the news. However, there are some things you can do to make the conversation easier and, hopefully, set the stage for a more amicable and favorable divorce resolution.

Be prepared to tell your spouse that you want a divorce

This isn’t a conversation that you should improvise. Instead, be sure that you’re fully prepared so that the talk goes as smoothly as possible. Consider each of the following:

  • Your safety: This is paramount. If you’re in an abusive relationship or your spouse has a history of explosive anger, then think carefully about where you’re going to break the news. A public place or over the phone might be best in these circumstances.
  • Have main points you want to make: By identifying major points beforehand, you can focus the conversation and ensure that you don’t lose yourself in the emotions involved.
  • Choose your language carefully: Try not to lay too much blame, if any, during this conversation. You also don’t want to come across as too aggressive. So, consider using neutral language that talks about what’s best for both parties. If your spouse tries to blame you or verbally attack you, don’t get overly defensive. Merely apologize and indicate that there’s no other alternative to getting a divorce.
  • Give your spouse some space: This might be easy to do, but that doesn’t minimize its importance. Your spouse might need some time to process what’s happening and prepare for life after divorce. You should do the same. That’s why you might want to think about staying somewhere else for the time being.
  • Don’t dig deeply into legal issues: Your spouse might have a lot of questions about property division, child custody, and other divorce legal issues. Don’t make promises and try to hold off on addressing these issues until you discuss them with your attorney.

If you’re like most people, you could benefit from a lot of support during your divorce. While family and friends are certainly beneficial, an attorney can help you come up with a strategy that can help you secure a positive outcome for your future after divorce. Therefore, it might be best to talk to your attorney before you even address divorce with your spouse.